2006 - The Year That Was

Okay so Christmas is over. The mince pies are all gone, the Quality Street is almost empty (apart from the boring toffee penny ones), the comb, moustache, fake plastic nail-through-finger and spinning top from the crackers are over the dining table along with the salt and pepper and other stuff we couldn't be bothered to put away after christmas dinner. We've had a sleep and played a quiz and now it's time to turn our attention to the fact that in four days time 2006 will be over and consigned to the history books as the year that was.

And how better to reflect upon 2006 than with a cheesy quiz that someone emailed to me...

1) Where did you begin 2006? In Cathy's flat drinking pints of vodka and diet coke, eating chinese and playing music DVD quizes!

2) What was your status by Valentine's Day? Single. Someone later told me they wanted to send me a card but had no idea how to get it to me!

3) Were you in school (anytime this year)? Nope. I've worked all year. In the same job!

5) Did you have to go to the hospital? Not for treatment

6) Did you have any encounters with the police? Only through work. Not cos I'd done anything naughty! I'm a good girl!

7) Where did you go on holiday? Rhodes, with my sister. Also went to Albi (France) for a rugby game and on a rugby torunament in Reading.

8) What did you purchase that was over £500? Other than my holiday, nothing. My season ticket was just over £300

9) Did you know anybody who got married? Yep, Camilla and Chris got married. And Dave and Vicky (but I didn't go to that one)

10) Did you know anybody who passed away? Yes. Sadly.

11) Have you run into anybody you left high school with? Yes. Not that I really remembered him!

12) Did you move anywhere? Nope

13) What sporting events did you go to?Well I went to the odd Warriors match. Also went to the Guinness Premiership Final (which was good) and the Middlesex Sevens (Not so good!)

14) What was the best concert/show did you go to? I don't think I went to one. That seems quite sad. I wanted to go see Paulo Nutini but couldn't because of work.

15) Are you registered to vote? Yes

16) Who did you want to win Big Brother? Pete - He was cool.

17) Where do you live now? Worcester

18) Describe your birthday. I didn't really do anything on my actual birthday. Went out for a nice meal with parents. Couple of days later was the first pre-season at the rugby so I celebrated with my friends at that.

19) What's the one thing you thought you would never do but did in 2006? Help get rid of my boss!

20.) What has been your favourite moment? Probably the Albi trip a couple of weekends ago. There was probably about an hour in the entire weekend when I wasn't having a brilliant time. Holiday with my sister was cool too. Oh and the London Marathon and the 18 hours in the white van to and from the Great North Run.

21.) What's something you learned about yourself? People think a lot more of me than I tend to believe.

23.) What was your best month/months? April and May

24.) What music will you remember 2006 by? Paulo Nutini

25) Who has been your best drinking buddy? Marie. Considering about 18 months ago I thought she hated my guts, she's become quite a good friend!!

26) Made new friends? Yes - Sophie's someone I feel like I've known forever.

27) New best friend? No. But some good friends have become very good friends.

28) Favourite Night out? End of Season dinner. Bloody brilliant night.

29) Any regrets? One or two but lets not dwell on them!

So, Sunday evening is New Year's Eve. The one night of the year I utterly despise! New Year's Eve comes with far too much pressure.

Firstly, you have to decide who you want to spend New Years Eve with. If you have several different groups of friends this can be particularly difficult. This can be made even worse if you have a boyfriend/girlfriend who also has several different groups of friends and often in different cities.

Once you've decided on who you're spending it with, you've then got to decide where. Invariably there are two basic options. Both come with pros and cons. Option 1: House party. Option 2: Pub/Bar/Club

Option 1: House party

Pros:
* Free to get in
* Take your own alcohol so relatively cheap
* No closing time
* Don't have to dress up or deal with annoying bouncers

Cons:
* You're stuck with the same people all night with absolutely no chance of 'running into' another group of friends. It's also highly unlikely you'll meet anyone new.
* They're usually in the middle of nowhere which means you either have to sleep uncomfortably on someone's floor which means you start the new year, not only with a hangover but with the backpain from hell or you catch one of the most expensive taxis ever back to your own bed.
* People tend to drink far too much at house parties and someone ends up throwing up in the toilet which means if you actually need to use the toilet for reasons it was intended you have a long wait.
* Even worse someone throws up not in the toilet
* When the 'volatile' couple amongst your friends has their fight, everyone knows about it and it puts everyone in a bad mood.
* After you've tuned the telly into BBC to watch Big Ben's bongs then it's all a bit of a let down.
* You spend the entire night wondering if you'd have had more fun if you'd gone into town with your other group of friends.

Option 2: Pub/Bar/Club

Pros:
* Constant supply of music, usually quite fun and cheesy. Usually quite varied rather than the music nazi's choice from the house party.
* If you get bored with the people you're with, you can make some new friends!
* Everyone is in the party atmosphere, if there is anyone in a bad mood, they'll go home rather than hanging round like a rainy day!
* You can go to another bar if the one you're in is a bit crap

Cons:
* You have to pay to get in almost everywhere
* Drinks tend to magically go up in price
* Everywhere is packed so you queue for hours to get a drink
* At midnight some sleezy drunken vile excuse for a man seems to think its alright to invade your personal space and try to stick his tongue down your throat claiming it's a 'New Year Kiss'.
* You HAVE to have fun and can't get bored, tired and go home early!
* You spend the entire night wondering if you'd have had more fun if you'd gone to the house party with your other group of friends.

So, yes. I hate New Year's Eve. Last year was an exception. Last year I went round to Cathy's flat. We bought some snacks from Tescos and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory on DVD. We then went to 'Wok'n'Roll' for a chinese, we were in our PJs by 8:30 and spent the evening watching films, playing DVD games, watching the crap New Year's Eve telly and eating ourselves silly. At midnight, we leaned out of her window and watched the fireworks over the city.

Hopefully something similar will be happening this year but with Marie and Jon. Then on New Year's Day we'll all pile into my car and drive up to Northampton to watch some shite excuse for a rugby match...but that's another blog for another day.


Happy New Year !!!

The Good Life

Last weekend I went to Albi to watch Worcester Warriors take on Albi in the European Challenge Cup.

I went with Darren and Tracy, friends from the rugby club, but met up with several other people we know. There was a group of around 15 of us who spent most of the weekend together.

The majority of this group are known as 'The Giraffes'. They're a group of men who are a variety of ages who enjoy rugby, enjoy drinking, enjoy singing and enjoy each others company. They're a lot of fun. In normal lives they're managing directors of companies, they're accountants, they're salesmen, they're team leaders but when it comes to the weekend and the rugby, none of that matters. It doesn't matter who does what for a living or how much money they earn or any kind of social status. The only agenda for weekends like this is to have fun.

And we did.

We started drinking about 7am at Gatwick airport where some poor kid was standing outside duty free giving away Baileys. He fast became my best friend and didn't have the heart to tell me to piss off! We then flew to Tolouse and went to a bar called 'Le Winger' where the alcoholic owner with very limited English bought us pints of Heineken and kissed us goodbye in a very continental way. After arriving in Albi and getting sorted in our hotel we went to O'Sullivans, an Irish bar just round the corner from our hotel. It's the pub in the picture and the outside had been made to look like Santas Grotto. Very cool. I don't know why when we go to foreign countries we look for Irish/British bars but we found it, it was nice. We then sat there all night and drank and sang and stood on chairs.

This set the tone for the weekend where more drinking, singing and standing on chairs ensued.

There was a rugby match at one point too!! It almost seemed a bonus in a weekend of fun and winning was the icing on the cake. The Albi supporters were very hospitable, I was invited to serve behind the bar and then got given free beer! All good!!

I've never laughed so much in one weekend. Every single minute of it was fun. It made me realise that as much as I get worked up over work or friends or men or life or anything else, at the end of the day, it is possible just to have fun.

If only all of life could be like that although I don't know if my liver could cope!

If car technology had kept up with computer technology...

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If General Motors had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue.For some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a manoeuvre such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.

7. The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all overagain because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.

Dear Alcohol...

Dear Alcohol:

First & foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. My friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work cocktail, a beer at the game, and you're even around at Christmas hidden inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless family gatherings.

However, lately I've been wondering about your intentions. While I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unwise consequences:

1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity takes place after 2 a.m.Why would you make me call those ex-boyfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night?

2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I eat a kebab with chili sauce, along with a big Italian meatball and some stale chips (washed down with WINE & topped off with a Kit Kat after a few nachos and biscuits)? I'm an eclectic eater, but I think you went too far this time.

3. Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do more yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black & blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me.

Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front door key into the lock.

4. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous. I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in order, but the 3pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable! My entire day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken (water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin) prior to going to sleep/passing out face down on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn, the hangover should be minimal & in no way interfere with my daily activities.

Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like to ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets.

In order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than Thursday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions & hopefully we can continue this fruitful partnership.

Thank you,

Your biggest fan

P.S. THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity
2. British Constitution
3. Passive-aggressive disorder

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Nope, no more beer for me.
2. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely outtonight?
3. Oh, I couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing.

Last Friday was World Aids Day.

I sat reading The Independent as I ate my breakfast and found myself getting more and more enraged as I read it.

I don't like the Independent as a paper. It never seems to have much news in it any,ore. It is some commentary on whichever issue appears to be in Vogue that day, informs us in big letters across the front page of just how horrific this issue is, spends several pages getting on it's pappery high horse about how the government is doing nothing to fix whatever problem they've decided is the most important for that particular day.

So, on Friday the front cover read ' WORLD AIDS DAY'. Across the top of the page it said that a percentage of the money made from the sales of the paper that day would go towards fighting AIDS in Africa. At the bottom of the page there was the (red) symbol: a campaign related to the Make Poverty History campaign where huge corporate companies pretend that they're not completely soul's and are trying to help put the world to right but only because this is the new trendy way to do it.

The next few pages of the paper had several articles about the AIDS epidemic in Africa. About how horrific it was that so many people in Africa were suffering and how it was a huge problem and wasn't it time we did something about it. Each article was complete with photo of generic African orphan or group of women. Every single page was talking about how more needed to be done to fight AIDS in Africa and put a stop to it.

Friday 1st December is WORLD AIDS day. Not AFRICAN AIDS Day.

Why fight AIDS in Africa? Why not fight AIDS EVERYWHERE? It is a global problem. People in every single country in the world are suffering from HIV and AIDS. I appreciate that it is a huge problem in Africa but it is not confined to one continent.

When I as at University I did some work with a local AIDS charity called Positive Action Southwest. I met the people who worked there and the people they helped. I met and talked to several people who were suffering with HIV and AIDS.

Why, suddenly, is their suffering any less important than someone living in Africa? Yes, there are a lot more drugs available in the UK but that doesn't make the mental and emotional side of things any easier to deal with. The side effects of some of these drugs are horrific. Drugs don't always make things better. Drugs don't make them any less important.

45% of people in Britain think that there is a cure for AIDS. There isn't. It is still a death sentence wherever you live in the world.

I wore my red ribbon on Friday. I showed my awareness but somehow I feel like World AIDS Day has taken a step backwards.